Remember that card I gave you? It said, “If I know what love is, it is because of you.” It’s true, you know. I loved you so much. I still love you…
I loved you more than you could ever imagine. Loving you was the only thing that I was ever really good at. God. Five years, you know. I didn’t love you unconditionally, though. I loved you with one important, what’s the word? Caveat? Yeah, that. All you had to do was love me back. Remember how I used to tell you all the time that all I ever wanted was for you to be happy? That was a lie. Fuck that. Of course I wanted you to be happy, but with me. Without me, I want you to be miserable. I want you to hate your fucking life, and hate yourself for not loving me like I needed you to. I don’t want to be a fond memory. I don’t want you to look back on what we had and smile out of the corner of your mouth, and do that thing where you curl your hair around your finger. I want you to suffer. Desperately. I want you to be in so much pain that you call me, weeping, begging for me to take you back. But I won’t. Because I’m over this shit.
Anyway, I guess you’re asleep. I know it’s late over there. Just call me when you get this, or whatever.
[She was gone in sixty seconds; left single.]
Our friend Brent writes for us today. He also writes for himself at The Third Revelation every now and then (not as often as we’d like, because it’s great).